Gone are the days when we gathered around our grandma and begged her to narrate fairy-tales. We used to listen with fear and delight. Whenever we felt lonely, we would badger her to tell us a story. She knew plenty of long stories appropriate especially for cold days of winter. Perhaps, sometimes she herself fabricated some stories with a fertile imagination. She also talked about Doomsday and spun tales that she had heard from mullahs during religious ceremonies. Those days are really the sweet memories of my childhood.
We used to join the children of the village playing marbles, hide-and-seek, mock-fight, etc. and enjoyed ourselves as children do. Our childish fight and quarrels lasted for only a short time and soon we would make peace with one another without a tinge of revenge, showing the utmost honesty and simplicity. Those days passed in the blink of an eye.
On Eid days, our people cooked traditional foods and all the villagers gathered for a food fest. Men and women had their own separate rooms; eating and talking joyfully. The children’s festive mood, laughter and childish pranks added spice to the parties.
There was deep sincerity among the relatives and the villagers. They had close contact with one another sharing their joys and sorrows at all times. The mud-built and simple houses were filled with heart-warming, honest people. They were always exchanging sweet words with one another. Even though, there was a lack of money and property, lack of skyscrapers, vehicles, and many other luxuries, the quality of high sincerity and happiness among the people were beyond doubt. Their relationship was not based on money or wealth but on mere friendship, love and genuineness.
Children would help their parents in farming and household chores. If one’s father was shepherd, the children would also help the father in taking the cattle for grazing. Farming was a life-style transferred from father to son.
In case, one intended to go away for a long period to any other village, one first went to the neighbors, from door to door to say goodbye. The elders would pray for them before kissing them goodbye. Such departures always tore apart the mothers’ hearts.
Gradually people started leaving for far places, such as the neighboring countries, for work. Moreover, they returned with some bigger amounts of money. Then they had money to build tall houses. They focused all their attention and energy on material goods and the luxuries of life. This infectious tendency spread slowly from one person to another. A deep rivalry emerged among the villagers and people started travelling to far off places, to earn money. Competing for money was very serious. Their attention was diverted from relationship to ownership. In other words, the sincere relationships were in danger of erosion and the death of honesty followed.
Globalization started swallowing the joy and sincerity of the villagers as they travelled to foreign countries. The youngsters started travelling in large numbers, with a strong appetite for money. Mothers were getting used to the absence of their children and took it no hard. Now, nothing could bring a smile, other than money and possession. Friendships were breaking up and wealth became the people’s only claim to status.
Homes were vacant and a cold silence started prevailing. In some families, only the mothers with their female children were the occupants of their homes. Of course, the head of the family along with his male children had left the village to bring money in order to compete with their neighbors for the luxuries of life. One’s kith and kin and friends changed to financial rivals.
They did not only return with money but also with foreign habits and changed from kind villagers to unkind citizens. They even forgot some of their friends and relatives. Moreover, some more children were born in some families in their absence and they did not know them. Therefore, the sincere atmosphere of the villages completely changed. In addition, they brought foreign styles, fashion and culture which eroded and displaced the culture of their parents and villagers, with the passage of time.
Now our village has gone into a deep silence and my childhood playmates are either in international camps or the citizens of foreign countries such as Europe and Australia. The houses seem to have changed into nursing homes and the elderly people, parents and grandparents are left lonely. Though, they are supported by their children financially, the past joys and happiness is no more seen on their faces. They miss their children.
In addition, now many teenagers abandon schooling and leave for foreign countries with the intention of earning money. Of course, their thoughts are disturbed by the worldly amusements and luxuries of life and they can hardly concentrate on their lessons.
It is not only the issue of money, however, education also matters. Some travel to foreign countries mostly thorough scholarships for continuing their education. Our sub-standard educational system in Afghanistan forces them to travel to other countries. Hence, many leave their homes for one reason or another.
This issue is a great cause for concern for the families especially for the parents. They wish to live with their children with peace of mind, the same as in the past. The absence of their children has left a great vacuum in their life. Moreover, most probably money will be valued, but not at the cost of the family’s joy and cheerfulness. Furthermore, the death of honesty and sincere friendships is an irreparable loss in today’s life. I think, the wounds in the parents’ hearts will not be healed easily and they have no option other than shouldering the sadness. It is really a sad phenomenon in the hustle and bustle of modern life.
By: Sayed Roshan
